I run a discussion group which meets once a month to discuss
ethical non-monogamy, and I have been thinking lately about what that actually
means, and how hard it is to live up to sometimes. This was brought on by a
temptation that I faced recently which would have been unethical in several
different ways—none of which mattered in the moment. I would have gone ahead
and fucked the person I wanted to fuck if we had been in any kind of position
to make it happen, and in the weeks since this meeting I have had to fight
every single day to keep myself from putting us in that position.
A large part of me can’t but feel hypocritical, but I keep
trying to remind myself that I am human and more than capable of making
mistakes.
I also have to keep reminding myself that no matter how much
I want this person, and no matter how amazing the sex would be and feel, to be
non-ethical would feel much worse.
But—if we find ourselves in that position again, I, well, I
just don’t know.
