I don’t know.
Okay, that is far too simplistic, but it is true--mostly. Recently I have started to realize that maybe, just maybe, I am ready to settle down a bit. But what in the hell does that mean?
It means I want a primary relationship. I want a man, or possibly a woman, who is single and who understands ethical non-monogamy.
I want someone who can accept that I will most likely already be in relationships of various types when we get together. One of my sexual/play relationships just ended—or at least got put on hold when he moved across the country—so currently I have one occasional play/sexual partner, and one potential sexual partner—I have no idea how those relationships will evolve, or what new relationships I may get involved in. What I do know is that I will probably not be open to the idea of dropping all current relationships for someone, though I would certainly put things on hold if it looked like there was some serious potential that needed proper concentration and attention.
I want someone who understands that I do not sit still well, and that occasionally I go to work and get asked questions like “how would you like to spend two months in Siberia?” The answer, by the way, to questions like that will always be yes.
I want someone who is open to kink—if not participating in it, then at least realizing that I will be participating with others.
I want someone who is interested in building something amazing, but who realizes that we will not complete each other.
I want someone to wake up next to, to watch, and mock, television with, to cook for, to do all of those sappy little relationship things with (yes, I am a romantic at heart—shhhhh).
The thing is, though, that I do not NEED any of that—and I like that. I have never had a problem being alone, and I do not need a relationship to validate my life. When, and if, I find the person with whom I want to settle down, it will be bullshit free.
That is what I want.